When you are a child and your parents are responsible for you, hopefully you have memories that your parents loved you and did the best they could with what they had.

Many adults struggle with their own childhood memories, and their interpretation of how their childhood was managed by the adults in the home. Many times there is more than one child in a family, and each child can remember the situation differently. A brother or sister may disagree with how one of their siblings describe the way their mother or father disciplined them, what the family rules were, or why each of them turned out the way they did.

Families are complicated and communication with each other can be difficult. Who is going to care for Mom and/or Dad when something happens and they cannot care for themselves?

There are few things that I have experienced in my career that can compare to an experience I had with a family that came to the hospital to visit their very ill mother. I was the administrator on call, and was notified by a nursing station charge nurse, that a family was being disruptive in a patient’s room. When I arrived, it was clear that the children had all been notified that their mother was ill by who knows what relative, and one by one they showed up to the hospital. They were all adults. It appeared that they had not spoken to each other in years, and all of a sudden they were faced with a dying mother.

One child wanted “everything medically possible” completed on his mother’s behalf, while another argued that their mother did not want to be left in a vegetative state. There were so many loud voices coming from the room, I had to literally separate them, and limit them to individual time with the patient (their mother, who was not responding, and had her eyes closed), while the others had to leave the room. They had to rotate visiting their mother every two hours, to avoid being in the same room at the same time.

Walking away from that experience I was stunned to see that much dysfunction in one family, in one room. That poor mother. What in the world happened when they were growing up that made them that unable to talk to each other? I have found that usually one adult child in a family takes on most of the caregiving, but when the end appears to be close at hand, everyone shows up. They bring their opinions and their guilt. Dealing with their guilt should be no one’s job, except for the family member that showed up at the last minute, and wanted to cause the most disruption.

If it is possible to talk to family members/siblings about the health of a parent you are caring for, try to do it.  If it has become impossible, let us know.

Have you ever had an experience as a caregiver that involved another family member that was difficult? Tell us what it was. Maybe it is still going on. How can we help? Let us help you problem solve the situation. There are always options to consider. “Now let’s get going!” xo Sally

Every day we are surrounded by amazing things, happening right under our nose. We are busy; moving quickly, running errands, working, meetings, you name it.

Sometimes we are so busy we miss important things that are going on with our friends, family, co-workers, even with ourselves.

If we don’t stop to recognize small improvements, little steps toward larger goals, or the effort someone may be making towards improving a situation at the work place; we are missing a lot.  Make an effort to see what you are missing. Be part of the change that is possible. Here are a few things to consider:

1.    When someone is talking to you, stop what you are doing and look at them. Let them finish what they are saying before you interrupt them with your thoughts. Make yourself a note while they are talking if you don’t want to forget your thought, but let them finish.

2.    When you respond to them, repeat the main thought that they were talking about; “I understand that you think we should rotate lunch hours to improve customer service, is that what you mean?”

3.    Let the person agree that you have heard their comment or request the way they intended to deliver it to you.

4.    Then respond with your thoughts.

How can we see the things that are changing around us? What about things that need to change to make our environment healthier?

This same technique works with family discussions. People need to be heard and know that they conveyed their thought clearly before your opinion is expressed.

Let others express themselves and if their suggestion will not work in its entirety, how about a compromise? If someone is taking the time to suggest an alternative approach to a problem that is not being solved easily, then you may establish some innovative ideas through collaboration.

The old saying “two heads are better than one,” has a lot of truth to it. Keep an open mind when it comes to solving issues at work and at home.

Are you feeling burnt out and need some new ideas to cope with issues you are dealing with? Let us know what they are! We are here to help you! “Now, let’s get going!” xo Sally

When we look in a mirror we see a reflection of ourselves. What do you see when you look in the mirror? Are you seeing an accurate reflection of how you feel? Some days we certainly can look better than others, especially when we try a little harder and take a little more time. 

The important thing to ponder is what do you WANT to see in the mirror? Do you want to see a happier person? A healthier person? A more forgiving person? Every day you have the opportunity to change the image that you see in the mirror. How do you go about making the change you want to see?

First: Make a specific goal that you can accomplish within a month. If it’s weight loss, make the goal a realistic number for the month.

Second: Write down 3 ways that you are going to change your current behavior to meet that goal and achieve it.

Third: Post your Goal and Plan on the mirror that you use every morning and every night, and post the same information on the front of your refrigerator.

Fourth: Take a calendar and mark off each day that you followed your plan.

Tell us what your goal is going to be and let us cheer you on! We want to help you reach your goal and make sure that the person you see in the mirror is one that you are proud of! Everything you need to accomplish your goals is inside you. You may need to modify things a bit, but never lose sight of your goals. You are amazing and have great potential! Believe it! Join the Sallycares.com Community today!

Let me know what you need to reach your goal!  “Now, let’s get going!”  xo Sally

Each day we confront issues, attitudes and deal with the behavior of our family, friends and co-workers. One of the best things you can do to preserve your sanity is to opt out to deal with those things that really matter. They all may matter to you, but you need to give some thought to the actual importance of an issue, before you turn it into a big deal.

I define a “big deal” as something that is going to impact me or my family in a negative way. You can’t influence everything for the better, and sometimes you may want to react to something just because it bugs you. Don’t let that happen. Weigh the consequences of bringing up an issue that may not matter to anyone but you. You may be making a mountain out of a mole hill.

What we want to strive to do is live peacefully with those who do not share our opinion on a topic. We want to be able to share ideas and thoughts without creating an upheaval and potentially ruining a good relationship. So weigh your battles carefully. Don’t remain silent if there is a situation that requires you to fight the right battle to protect your rights or the rights of others.

The goal is to learn when to leave things alone. It is a daily challenge to make that decision, but if you take your time and listen to all sides of a situation you will make a more informed choice and get the best outcome! Try it and let me know how you do! “Now, let’s get going!” xo Sally

I don’t think that the average person considers themselves “old.” Most people cringe when they begin to feel like they are turning into their parents. For no apparent reason most of us reach a point where we hear ourselves saying things that our parents actually said, and are shocked to hear those words come out of our own mouths! (Especially when we are raising our children)

It is becoming more obvious to me that technology is moving rapidly and it is a challenge to keep up with it at times. All of the texting language that has developed could have its own dictionary. Abbreviations are the norm. In many schools it has been decided that teaching cursive handwriting is no longer important, because most of the communication is being done by computer.

Learning to type on a keyboard is more important than learning to write. That is unfortunate, because handwriting has been a person’s trademark. Does anyone remember the importance people have placed on handwriting analysis in the past? It actually has been pretty accurate. Handwriting has been considered an art. Some of the young people today cannot read cursive handwriting!

I would encourage you to try an experiment today. Instead of texting or emailing a message, pick up the phone and call the person you are communicating with. I believe that you will be more successful communicating your idea or opinion by actually talking to each other, rather than texting or emailing.

We are becoming limited in our communication skills. People can hide behind their emails, texts and computers. Being able to communicate with others enhances your success in relationships, at work and at home. Put down the cell phones today and start talking to each other.  Let me know what happens!

“Now, let’s get going” xo Sally

 “Don't let the fear of striking out hold you back.” Babe Ruth

Whenever we are confronted with a need to step out of our comfort zone and try something new, it can be pretty frightening.

Applying for a new job, moving to a new city, or just redefining yourself in a new way… is not easy. Plenty of times you may experience a little voice in the back of your mind that questions whether you have what it takes to meet that new goal. How do you handle that? What do you tell that voice that tries to convince you that where you are is “good enough,” or even worse; you will fail if you try to go forward with an idea that is outside of your usual routine.

Don’t fall for that! Stop thinking that you won’t make it. It has been said that 99% of success is just showing up! Look for new friends. Look for groups that support new business ideas or support groups that will help you move forward to broaden your horizon.

If you are at home, and you are a caregiver, let us help you find people you can connect to. We need to develop more groups of positive, like- minded people that will support each other.

Don’t fear “striking out” when trying to meet a need or reach a goal! We are here to help you! Contact Us and let us know what you are dealing with!   “Now, let’s get going” xo Sally

I found the poem below, and it struck a nerve in me. Most of us wish for the best life possible for our families and friends.

The challenge is that we need to work at developing a way to make it happen. We need to set goals and surround ourselves with positive, like-minded people.  Negative thinkers will bring us down. They will tell you that you either don’t have the skills, education or the capability to reach your goal. Don’t listen to them. 

Start your day with realizing that the negative people in your life are not happy. They probably haven’t reached their own goals. You do not need to follow in their footsteps.

You need to start a path of your own. You can make it! You can learn what you need to, to achieve your goal. Start planning today! You have nothing to lose!

You can do it, no matter what your situation. You control your mind, and that’s where you develop your plan! What is your goal?  

Is your situation stopping you? Can we help you figure out how that can be changed? Contact us and let us hear from you! “Now let’s get going !” xo Sally

It Can Be Done

The ones who miss all the fun - Are those who say, "It can't be done."
In solemn pride they stand aloof - And greet each venture with reproof.
Had they the power they'd efface -The history of the human race.
We'd have no radio or motor cars -No street lit by electric stars;
No telegraph nor telephone-We'd linger in the age of stone.
The world would sleep if things were run … By those who say, "It can't be done."

-Author Unknown

This weekend I wanted to give recognition to Delta Airlines and the way they honor our heroes that return home under the worst of circumstances.

There is so much negativity out there and specifically so little said about big corporations doing the right thing, I felt that it was important to share this video.

We need to join together and give thanks every day to the men and women fighting for our right to be free. They sacrifice themselves, time with their families and continue to fight for our freedom.

If you haven’t joined the Wounded Warrior Project, Adopt a Platoon or another organization that supports our troops, I would ask that you look into it. Everything matters.

A letter, a package as well as a donation, are all appreciated. We need to stand up for those that need our support. Please consider participating in a cause that supports our troops.

Visit these web sites and get involved! https://support.woundedwarriorproject.org, www.adoptaplatoon.org.

The holidays are coming around the corner! Make a difference!  “Now, let’s get going!” xo Sally

Do you have any scars? The word scar is usually used two ways; we either use the word scar to describe a visible mark after an injury, or we also use the word scar figuratively to describe a mark that can be left on us emotionally. Either way, scars do affect us.

When an injury leaves a scar, it gives us an opportunity to share an event that happened to us. Usually those stories include some type of learning and internal strength building. Even when we are left with emotional scars, we learn lessons.

We have to turn those lessons into experiences that make us grow in a positive way. If you take this thought a bit deeper, physical scars actually form scar tissue. For those in the medical field, we know that scar tissue forms all kinds of intricate web structures of collagen that work diligently to close an open wound. When people have a burn injury you have to work with the affected skin to manage the scarring process to reduce scar formations on the skin. With other injuries scar tissue exists, it just is not visible, but it’s there reinforcing the injured area.

Scar tissue is tough. It is a barrier. It protects you. Try something different today. Look at your scars; inside and outside. What story do they tell? How have your scars helped shape you into the person you are? “You ARE stronger than whatever tried to hurt you.” Believe that. Work towards your goals and be grateful for every scar you have, because they have added to your strength.

Let us hear from you. Tell us how your scars have strengthened you! You are stronger than you think! “Now, let’s get going!” xo Sally

“The things you do for yourself are gone when you are gone, but the things you do for others remain as your legacy.”Kalu Kalu

Have you ever thought about your legacy? Some people think that they are best remembered by donating money to a cause. If a person is able to donate large sums of money, they may build a building; contribute to research or any number of things. 

But what about people that don’t have large sums of money to donate? Do you recognize your value and what type of legacy you can leave? Do you have any extra time to volunteer? What about helping a person in need? What about donating time to a family member that has a need? That is what caregivers do every day. 

Being a good caregiver is a wonderful legacy. Taking care of each other is the most meaningful legacy we can provide. Caregivers work 24/7 and don’t feel fabulous very often. Caregivers are normal, everyday people that do extraordinary things. Frustrated at times; sure. Angry and scared; many times. Dealing with medical providers, facilities and trying to navigate the healthcare system that is changing around us is always a huge challenge. 

With all of that considered, you are still leaving your legacy each time you give of yourself and help another person. Be proud of what you do. Take care of yourself. Remember that you need to take some time for yourself to be effective as a caregiver. You are amazing! Believe it! “Now, let’s get going!”  xo Sally