We all know people who complain. We may be living with one or two of them. Why do we say "can't"? Well, an aggravated patient or care partner would have a quick answer.
"I just cannot do it."
First we have to decide if you physically can't do something, and if there is a reason for it. People who are paralyzed can't do some things. People who have dementia realistically can't handle certain activities. What is it that you are sure can't be done?
If the patient or care partner cannot do an activity, because they physically or mentally do not have the capability, that's a different topic. We need to know those kinds of problems and actually problem solve them one at a time.
If you are just sick and tired of something, and that's why you "can't" do it, then that changes the picture. What that means is that you don't want to do it, and there may be many reasons for that attitude.
Usually people decide that they "can't" do something anymore...or they just "can't" do it again. That is because there is some behavior that continues to surface that you are tired of. Is it the patient's behavior? Is it the care partner's behavior? Is it a combination?
The old line, "It takes two to tango," is really true. If one of you is fueling an attitude with negativity, there needs to be a change. Let us know what that is. Change is good...when it is productive and the outcome makes a situation better. What is your struggle? Tell us your issue on our blog, or send us an email through Contact Us.
Never believe that "Can't" cannot change to "Can."
"Now, let's get going" xo Sally